We are all perfectionists to a certain level.
As perfectionists we frequently push ourselves to be PERFECT PARENTS and to raise PERFECT CHLDREN.
As a parent living in a modern society, it’s not hard to get caught up in the struggle for perfection. We hear about perfect parties, perfect grades, and yes, perfect kids.
As a parent living in a modern society, it’s not hard to get caught up in the struggle for perfection. We hear about perfect parties, perfect grades, and yes, perfect kids.
But here’s the truth: our kids aren’t perfect. Nor are we. And that’s perfectly acceptable. Don’t get hung up on trying to raise perfect kids. Not only is it simply not possible; it could be damaging to your kids’ self-esteem.
Similarly, it is inadvisable to compare a child to others. Stress, negative emotions and prolonged pressure may cause lifelong consequences. Early life experiences affect brain structures, which influence three aspects of learning: attachment, emotional regulation, and self-esteem. These three fields of learnings influence the child’s ability to relate to others, acquire skills, and especially manage stress.
Expecting your kids to be perfect can devalue the effort they put in, create a fear of rejection, make them dissatisfied with themselves, cause anxiety and guilt, and damage your relationship with them.
Instead of pushing your kids to strive for perfection, focus on their hard work. Good results are nice, but the real learning takes place in the journey to get there.
That’s why, it is very important to allow the child to grow at his own pace and avoid any pressure related to our own personal desires as parents.
By shedding your unrealistic aspirations and focusing on parenting with passion and love, you will undoubtedly deepen your relationship with your kids and find truth and happiness based on who you are, not what you, or your kids, achieve.
It’s okay not to be a perfect parent or to have perfect kids. In fact, it’s better than okay; it’s human.
So instead of trying to raise perfect but unhappy children, try to focus on raising your perfectly imperfect children the happiest you can.
